blue portrait
Blue portrait, oil on canvas, 2020
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Blue portrait, oil on canvas, 2020
Self portrait painted in times of isolation……
I don’t know how many souls I have.
I’ve changed at every moment.
I always feel like a stranger.
I’ve never seen or found myself.
From being so much, I have only soul.
A man who has soul has no calm.
A man who sees is just what he sees.
A man who feels is not who he is.
Attentive to what I am and see,
I become them and stop being myself.
Each of my dreams and each desire
Belongs to whoever had it, not me.
I am my own landscape,
I watch my own journey –
Different, mobile and alone.
Here, where I am, I can’t feel myself.
That’s why I read, as a stranger,
My being as if it were pages.
Not knowing what will come
And forgetting what has passed.
I note in the margin of my reading
What I thought I felt.
Rereading, I wonder: “Was that me?”
God knows, because he wrote it.
Fernando Pessoa
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